This fill-in-the-blanks style post has been going around for a few weeks now. It began on Thought Catalog, then Emily of Cupcakes and Cashmere filled it out, and then my girl Brittany over at Brit Brit Land shared her answers. I’ve been intrigued by both the things that made the criteria of a (every?) happy woman, and the answers these women have given. Because I love to be a part of larger conversations, I want to give my own answers.
*Before I do, I want to be really clear about something. It does a disservice to the writer’s answers, and even more to women everywhere, to say that these are criteria for every happy woman. I honestly think it’s pretty problematic to assume that these are things women should want, need, or be able to obtain all of these things in order to be “truly happy.” A go-to karaoke song does not a happy woman make. But I digress. Because my job, lifestyle, support system, etc., I am able to access and enjoy these things.
1. A go-to drink. A mojito or a strawberry margarita.
2. A go-to karaoke song. Valerie by Amy Winehouse and Tik Tok by Ke$ha
3. A uniform. Stripes and high-waisted bottoms. Fit and flare dresses with flats.
4. A hairstylist they love. My girl Melanie at Frenchy’s Beauty Parlor!
5. An exercise routine. If I haven’t found this yet, am I not a happy woman? I like to walk. I didn’t hate Nia. I feel pretty happy either way.
6. A hobby. Blogging! I feel so much happier having a space to call my own, where I can write and share anything I want. When I have free time, I enjoy the process of crafting posts, so it isn’t a chore or another job for me. And also podcasting!
7. A best friend. Rather than a single best friend, I have a support system of incredible, loving, ambitious, funny, talented, smart, challenging people in my life. Some of them know each other, and some of them don’t, but together they make up the awesome team of people that keep me going.
8. A healthy sense of self. I think women, in our nature, will all say that this is a work in progress. For me, it’s about being aware of myself: my body’s needs, my mind’s needs, and the needs of my emotional self. Being in touch with these things helps me not feel ashamed for taking the time to care for myself. In my opinion, shame is the biggest thing that keeps us from having a healthy sense of self.
If I had to recreate this list, I might add something about “a go-to girls-night-in ritual,” “a feel-good playlist,” and “an eatery/coffee shop where you feel comfortable, or even friendly with the staff.”
Do these 8 things make you a happier woman? What would you add to the list?